Ellen “Ellie” Starer, 78 41 Years Lost
Hailing from Philadelphia, the “City of Brotherly Love,” Ellie has always inherently felt that love is love. She has loved men. She has loved women. But after graduating college, launching a professional career, marrying and having children, Ellie finally shed her concern for public judgment and entered midlife openly as a lesbian. Maturity and changing societal norms had given her the confidence she needed to finally be herself. As a psychotherapist over many decades, Ellie has worked with LGBT+ people, some teens. Standing with them, she has consistently told them that they were OK; it was society that was not OK.
Sexual orientation is a term that always seemed silly for me, because I felt I was attracted to both men and women, and wasn’t that great? Why could that be a problem? But the times I grew up in, it was a problem.
I didn’t find there was very much difference between loving a man and loving a woman … In general, love is love.
I was much more comfortable in relationships with women when I was older, in my late thirties, so how people judged me was no longer a concern. Living in a free and honest way and becoming a progressive, accepting person was perfect for me.
I worked in the Anti-Vietnam War Movement … We were against the war. We demonstrated. I remember having my baby Joanna strapped to my chest. We were arrested in Washington … We were activists.